The End of Silent Waiting

The sky, the ocean, the sand and I

This morning, I came across a VT that was posted from Angelina Jolie's account. I'm not sure if it was truly her or someone using her name, but the message in that video really opened my eyes.

For the past three months, I've been very close to a man. At least, that’s how I feel—I’m not sure if he feels the same way. But honestly, I haven't been this close to a man since my breakup last July. We text almost every day. Even though we’ve only talked on the phone about once a month, but every time we do, it brings me so much joy. Our calls usually last two hours, and we talk about everything—work, his boss, my boss, college life memories, high school memories, even family.

We share so many things in common. I admire the way he thinks, his vision, and his principles. He’s charismatic and logical—a combination I find very attractive. He makes me smile, laugh, and sometimes even cry—all at once. Since March, I’ve stopped crying over my ex. It’s as simple as this: I finally had someone to talk to, someone to share my anger, my silliness, and even my daily routines with.

Without realizing it, I began to adore him. But until now, he has never asked me out for lunch or dinner. Sure, we’ve hung out a few times, but always in a group—never just the two of us. And that’s what keeps me wondering: what does he really want? Does he only see me as a friend? Or perhaps as an older sister, since I’m four years older than him?

Long story short, I decided to take some time to reflect and discern. That’s when I found the video.

It said this:

"There’s a reason why a man texts you, but disappears once you reply. Of course, he texts you because he likes you—but what he likes more than you is his freedom. That’s why he keeps his options open. Many men text several women at once just to see what’s out there. While you think, 'He’s texting me, he must like me,' the truth is—he just wants to know you’re still available. Every man knows women fall for what they hear. So they send beautiful texts to draw you in, whenever he wants. And while you might respond, trying to keep the conversation going, he might not even be in the mood to chit chat. Remember, he just wanted to check if you’re still an option. A man who truly wants you will show it through his actions—he’ll spend time, money, and effort on you. He’ll take you out, buy you gifts, and be present in your life."

The lesson I learned is this: I need to stop hoping that he will make an effort—because he won’t. In this situation, I’m just an option to him.

I want to allow myself to feel the sadness. But I won’t allow myself to keep waiting.

And deep down, I realized that he’s never truly see me as a woman who could be loved.

In my pray I said :
God, if he is not meant to be mine, please take away this longing from my heart. Help me to let go with grace, and guide me to find peace in his absence.